5 Tips to Stay Focused on Wedding Planning
Staying Focused on Wedding Planning is a huge challenge for many brides. It is such an exciting time planning YOUR dream wedding. It is easy to get distracted. There are so many new ideas coming at you everyday, it really is a wonder brides can make decisions on their own wedding. But you can and do. Once decisions are made it is time to stop looking and concentrate on being focused on wedding planning. YOUR Wedding Planning.
Have you heard of the Shiny Object Syndrome (SOS)? It is the tendency to chase something new. SOS is usually applied in business but is also comes to mind in wedding planning and brides’ visions of their wedding. Staying Focused in Your Wedding Planning is always a challenge and SOS only makes it worse!
How to Know if You have Shiny Object Syndrome –
Staying Focused on Wedding Planning
You know that you as a bride have experienced the Shiny Object Syndrome if you :
- keep seeing the next best wedding dress and can’t decide on “the one” for you. Or even worse you bought the dress and are still dress shopping.
- are constantly adding new things and ideas to your wedding planning list after you made decisions. You can’t seem to accomplish any of them.
- are mesmerized by one Pinterest wedding idea to the next and can’t seem to settle on your own vision.
- have a collection of wedding apps, tools and books, but you do not actually use any of them.
- keep looking for more ideas, even when you have made up your mind about your wedding.
The Issue with the Shiny Object Syndrome –
And Staying Focused on Wedding Planning
Many brides deal with these same issues, so please don’t feel you did anything wrong. It is called the Shiny Object Syndrome. It has even been a called a disease – the disease of distraction. For brides, SOS means being constantly drawn to the latest wedding ideas and abandoning current plans and tasks – many which are already in progress. With all the excitement, it is easy to get distracted. It takes determination to say focused on wedding planning.
The most obvious example is the “dress regret” when a bride has already purchased her perfect dress, then falls out of love with it, and continues to shop. The bride isn’t focused on wedding planning but may be caught up the thrills of dress shopping. (It really can be exciting and is hard to give up.) But there are many other distractions, so please read on.
The name SOS comes from the similarity to a young child’s limited attention span, and almost obsessed attraction to anything that is new and shiny. As a new object is placed in front of a child, he/she is intrigued and loses interest in old items, with the process repeating each time a new object is introduced.
5 Tips for Brides on How to Avoid the Shiny Object Syndrome
So how can you stay focused on wedding planning and avoid the shiny object syndrome?
1. Understand That New Does Not Mean Better
It is okay to look (even necessary when you are just beginning and want a unique wedding) at new things and ideas for your wedding. That is not Shiny Object Syndrome. As you start to plan your wedding, it is important to keep in touch with the latest trends and updates and know what is available to you – until you make your decisions.
However, once you have made your wedding decisions, and continue to follow every latest look, and doubt your decisions, you are not focused on YOUR wedding planning. You are wasting time, money and your energy rather than concentrating on YOUR fabulous wedding.
You must remind yourself that just because something is new or different from what you have selected for your wedding, does not mean it is better. Just because you have not seen an idea before, does not mean it is better than what you fell in love with. Trust yourself and what your chose. It is the real you.
2. Learn to See Past the Hype
The wedding industry is an enormous tower of spectacular and innovative ideas and ways to separate you – the bride -from her money. If you are a Pinterest fanatic (like me) or subscribe to bridal magazines or blogs, you will constantly see new shiny objects presented to you by the wedding industry.
You’ll see rave reviews, celebrity endorsements, gorgeous wedding layouts, promised short term discounts and more. They are all designed to create a mentality where you feel you need to have this or that for your own wedding – or suffer the shame of a less than perfect wedding. (My grandma used to call this heifer dust.- A polite way of saying BS.)
See past the propaganda. What is good for others is not always good for you. You do not always get what is promised. Buy today or the deal disappears is a deal that will be back in a couple of days. 95% of the wedding photos you see online and in magazines are not real weddings. And finally, you will never accomplish that look in your real-world wedding no matter how much money you spend or ideas to implement. They are photo shoots, not weddings.
If you have already found what you love, invested your time and money in it, walk away from the hype and enjoy what you have. Stop looking. Your wedding will be fabulous. Trust me (and yourself).
3. Assess the Fit with Your Wedding Vision
Before you jump on board with the newest and greatest wedding idea, think about how (and if) it fits into your wedding vision. Or is just the hottest new thing in the wedding industry? How will it fit into your wedding day? Your venue? Your dreams? Ask yourself:
- Is this new idea realistic for of my wedding day? (Don’t be blinded by the shine.)
- Is this what I really want or need for my wedding day?
- Will it add value and joy to my wedding day?
- What are the pros and cons of including this in my wedding?
- Will anyone care (or even notice) if I make this change?
- Is this important to my guests and their enjoyment of my wedding?
- If I include this new idea, what do I have to sacrifice of my current plans?
- What will it cost in terms of time, money and bride stress, if I make this change?
- Will I just be one more bride following a trend? If everyone is doing it, my wedding is no longer unique.
Only include something in your wedding if it is what you want or need and if it adds genuine joy and happiness to your wedding memories. Just because others are doing something doesn’t mean you have to.
4. Eliminate Unnecessary Distractions
Remember, SOS is the “disease of distraction”. The best way to avoid distraction is not through the discipline of ignoring it when you see it. It is by managing the sources of your distraction, so you never see them in the first place.
Once you have made your wedding planning decisions, there is really no reason for you to continue to spend time researching the latest ideas. Be satisfied with what you have chosen and invested your time and money in.
Continuing to research weddings ideas on Pinterest and subscribing to wedding magazines and blogs with new offerings, will disrupt your focus from what is important – implementation of YOUR wedding plans.
Avoid the stress of dealing with the overload of information that you no longer need. (For some great ideas on relieving Bride Stress, we’ve created a series of articles for you. Click below to read the first in our series later.)
Instead of spending time deleting emails, pinning more pins and draining your mental energy by seeing more trending ideas, remove interruptions and temptations from your field of vision.
Evaluate your social media news feeds, Facebook group memberships, Pinterest browsing, email subscriptions, and RSS feed subscriptions. Unsubscribe from those that are no longer providing you with useful relevant information for your wedding. Now is the time to focus on YOUR wedding planning
5. Understand the Impact of Switching Your Plans
Despite all that we have said, there are still some of you who will continue to look at new ideas. And that is okay. It your wedding. Just be aware that changing plans can be very expensive in terms of time, money and bridal stress.
Why continue to shop when your time is better spent on what you deciding on for YOUR wedding? You are invariably going to find something that interests you. This can only lead to two things –
- disappointment when you decide to forgo the new thing or
- additional costs to you when you change plans.
The “switching costs” can be monetary but are often invisible costs. They may be the mental cost of changing your focus and adapting your entire wedding plan to include the new idea.
When you are investing your time and energy in switching, that means that other things you had already planned are going undone.
When enticed with a new idea for your wedding, be sure to factor in such costs.
Have you been distracted by shiny objects? It’s time to refocus on your own wedding Clarify your big wedding priorities. Invest your time and energy in the areas that focus on your goal – to have a fabulous wedding celebration to begin your new life together.
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